Hey, you guys. Welcome back to the podcast. I'm really excited to, as always, be with you wherever you're listening to this. Whether you're on a walk, on a drive, I just love being able to spend time with you. I love having a podcast because I listen to a lot of podcasts and it genuinely feels like I have a relationship with the people that I listen to, and so I don't take it lightly that you guys are listening.
So thank you for being here. Thank you for sharing the show. Thank you for your feedback and your support. I feel super blessed to do what I do and to have the community that I have, so thank you guys for being here. Today, we're talking about abundance reframes, and the thing that I get the feedback on the most is the belief work and the inner work and the mindset piece that contributes to business success.
If I had to say there's one thing that I do the most with my private clients, it is these reframes, and it's basically choosing a thought that feels more expansive that helps you get to where you want to go. I'm going to go through and share five different reframes for abundance. I love studying abundance.
I love talking about abundance. A year ago or so, I did the Abundant Heart Voxer event, and I love reading books about abundance. I love teaching it. I love hearing other people teach it in different ways. I love coaching on it. I love these distinctions, and so I wanted to share them in a concise place.
You've probably heard them before, maybe not in this way. So as always, I'm going to invite you to listen with the ears to hear the distinction. Don't listen to see like, “I know this or I've heard this before.” Listen for how it can affect your life and how you can use it to transform the way that you see the world.
I believe that consciousness is what basically fuels the reality that we get to experience, action too. You know I teach a lot about action but it comes from consciousness, our ability to see things differently, our ability to think on purpose, in our perception, which comes from consciousness. So like the way that we perceive circumstances in our life. With that being said, these distinctions can be very, very powerful. The first one that I'm going to share is wanting versus needing. The way that this shows up a lot for my clients is, this has been my work too. Sometimes it feels like we have to build a business or we have to post on social media or we need to sign clients.
But one of the things that I'm always remembering and speaking is that no one needs a coaching business. If you first hear that and you feel a little tight about that because it feels true that you need clients or it feels true that you need money, one of the things that has been helpful for me is I might need to pay my bills.
I might need to pay my mortgage or my rent. I might need to get transportation to and from my job or for my kids for school or whatever, but no one needs a coaching business. We chose it. No one needs to be an entrepreneur. We chose it, and that choice is the abundance, the wanting. Just even try it on: I need to sign clients versus I want to create clients. I need to make money versus I want to make money. I need to grow my business or I need to get an ROI versus I want to grow my business. I want to get an ROI. It feels so different, and so when I find myself needing, it's almost like I'm observing myself.
So I might not notice my thoughts at first, but to me it feels like pressure and stress and anxiety. That's a signal to me that I am in need. One of the things that I know to be true is I did not start an entrepreneurial business because I needed to. No one does. No one needs to be an entrepreneur.
That is a false statement. We want to be entrepreneurs, and so as much as possible, I am reframing that I want to be here, that I want to record this podcast. I want to send this email. I want to do marketing. I want to have a consult call. I want to figure out tech. I want to hire this person. Want, want, want, because the wanting is abundance. Needing is scarcity. That's the first one.
The second one is giving versus getting. One of the things that I know to be true is that if your clients win in the abundant exchange of business, it will feel better to you than if you feel like you are getting more than your clients. This is true for almost every single person I've ever coached.
People want to be in business to help other people. But if you feel like you are getting the better end of the deal, you will cap your business. Why? Because we have good hearts and we want to make a difference and we want people's lives to be better.
If it feels like you are getting the better end of the deal, in business, it doesn't feel great long term. It might be a good short term win, but long term that will drain your soul. In an extreme level, this is what scammers look like. They are getting the better end of the deal than their clients.
I think to be in an abundant exchange, it means that you are giving more than you are getting. This is what's crazy is you can feel and actually create a reality where you are giving more than you are getting at every price point. This has been transformational for me, and a lot of my clients who are moving into like high ticket coaching, premium coaching, this has been a huge shift for them where they realize they can over deliver even at high ticket prices.
If you've never thought about high ticket prices, or you have an aversion to high ticket prices, like this will change your life. Because you can over deliver, you can give more value than you charge, no matter what price you charge. That has been transformational for me as I've raised my prices and become the kind of coach that I want to become.
Just the coaches that I admire, watching them do what they do in the world. I used to not be able to wrap my mind around how Tony Robbins could charge a million dollars for one on one coaching. I'm like, how is that even possible? But then I realized it's because he delivers way more than a million dollars worth of value. So thinking of that, it doesn't matter what you charge. I think the goal of the coach should be to over deliver in the value that they create for their clients, and there's different ways of perceiving value. I like Alex Hormosi has a value equation where it's basically what people want, the perception of their ability to get what they want, and we eliminate the pain, effort, and sacrifice that's required to get what they want.
That's value. He like quantified it. The other way that I think of value, especially intangibles, is making people's lives better, helping people not feel alone on their journey, especially for one on one coaching on their journey to wherever they want to go.
The value of avoiding mistakes. The value of having someone to talk to, to process with, who believes in them, all these things are additional ways to add value to your clients. And, we can break it down like the content you create for your clients, the templates you create for your clients, the shortcuts you create for your clients, the resources you make available, the communication you have available: Voxer, Marco Polo, email, Zoom calls, phone calls, in person.
Whatever the medium is, you are creating touch points of value for your clients. And I have this theory, this hypothesis, that the coaches who make it in business big, have figured this out, that their clients get more than they do. What's interesting about this is whatever you charge, this is the abundant reframe, is how do you create more value than what they're paying for?
This is both a perception. This is believing in the value you provide as a coach, but it's also like facilitating an amazing experience of value, so you can brainstorm ways that you feel like you are giving more than you are receiving no matter what you charge. And this is how I don't have a lot of mind drama about selling my high ticket coaching because I know the value that I bring is more than what they're paying for, which is why I have a high retention rate, high renewal and referral rate, because I over deliver on the value that they're paying for.
Anyone can do this. If you ask for feedback, if you care about your clients, if you hone your skillset as a coach, if you are investing in yourself as a business owner, as a person, as a coach, you can create and facilitate an amazing transformational experience where the client is getting more than you are. And for the coach to be in the giving mode, that is an abundant reframe. How can I give more than I get?
The third one that I coach on all the time is this idea of luck. So the reframe is instead of getting lucky, you're creating. You are at cause of something happening. There are no flukes. Every once in a while I'll be talking to a client and they're like, well, I don't know where that client came from or like, it was just random, and I'm like, clients are never random.
There's principles. You can replicate that process if we look in the right places. What I mean by that is like, let's say, this is so common. I have clients that will come to me and say, well, I don't know where this client came from like someone just randomly found me on Instagram or what came from a friend of a friend.
So it just feels like a fluke. I'm like, no, you can replicate that process, when you ask for referrals. You can replicate people telling their friends about you. You can replicate an Instagram by creating shareable content, by posting regularly. Almost like you reverse engineer everything that it took to create this client.
Now you know the activities that you should commit to, to creating more clients. It is never a fluke. That is an abundant reframe because then everything is always within your power, and that feels way better than I got lucky. Lucky feels like scarcity. Creating feels abundant. Whenever you've done something that you want to do over and over again, look for the pattern of creation. How did I create this? If you've ever noticed that your brain is like, that was a fluke, that's random, that's lucky, in that moment, speak something different. How did I create this? No, I created this. I love that I created this. Anything else besides I got lucky or it was a fluke. It's never a fluke.
You're always creating. Whether you're consciously creating or not, that's what we can work on. The more conscious you are of how you're creating it, the more repeatable the process becomes because now you know what to think, you know what to believe, you know what to do to create the results that you want over and over and over again to keep your client pipeline full.
That, P.S., is what I teach in the Conscious Coach Academy. You can read more and join the waitlist at www.itsambersmith.com/academy, so that when I open the doors again in September, you can be the first to know. The fourth reframe: this is about us versus this is about me. I have just observed that coaches and entrepreneurs, when we make business about us and what we get and what we receive in the money we make, we shut down a lot of possibilities versus this is about us.
I like that this is about us because it doesn't mean that business isn't about you, cause it is. That's part of the equation, and if it's not ever about you, you will burn out because you will give too much. You will do things beyond your capacity, and this is where people burn out.
So it's not that it's not about you, it's that it's about you and many other people. This has been useful for me because that means that I am included. It's not that I am so selfless that I burn myself out. It's that I make decisions based on what benefits me and my community.
I make decisions based on me and my family. I make decisions based on me and my clients. I'm included in the conversation, but it's not just about me. It's about us. When you notice, like maybe you are overthinking your podcast or you are overthinking your pricing or you are overthinking this next offer, you're probably making it about you. Whether that's how people perceive you. Whether that's, am I getting it right or not? Am I doing the right thing?
What do people think of me? What judgments do people have? Versus this is about us. Sounds like I'm going to do this no matter what. I'm here until it works. There's so many people that can benefit from my message. There's ways that this will serve the world. When I get what I want, the world is better.
Those are beliefs that I actually have and teach because I really believe it. When we get stuck in the trap of this is about me, it shuts down creativity. I also think from a practical standpoint, your messaging is not as strong because business is not about you. Your offer, your product, your coaching package, your opportunity, your platform, whatever, is not just about you.
It is about how it benefits your clients, and people in business who win, get this at a deep level. They use words that resonate with their people. They create solutions for problems that people have. They speak to the client's desires and pain points and obstacles and vision for what they want, and help them create what they want over and over and over again and exceed their expectations.
I think about amazing, iconic companies like Apple or Nike. They did not create something that their founder wanted. They created something way beyond that. They created for us. I think that collective awareness of solutions, of expansion, which we're gonna talk about next, of growth as a community or as a group is a next level understanding of business because business is not about a singular people.
It's not about a singular person and it's not about you. It is about the collective impact. You and the client on your call, you and your social media following, you and your contract workers, you and, you know, the way that it impacts your family life.
It's about us. And so whenever I've noticed that I'm making it about me, I, as quickly as possible, reframe it is how is this about us? Who is this for? Who has benefited by this? And it immediately gets me into better action. If I feel stuck on a podcast, if I feel stuck on a post, I'm like, who is this for?
If this is about us, how can I serve? How can I help? Who needs to hear this? What do they need to hear? Different frame of mind than like, I hope they like this episode. I hope they like this post. I hope they're not offended that I raised my prices. It's like, no, this is about our growth. How can I put that out into the world?
The last distinction that I'm going to share, there's more distinctions but I'm just choosing to talk about five today to keep it simple, is expansion versus fixing. This has been a concept that has really resonated with you. Many people have told me that they like how I teach about expansion because I think in the personal development world, this is just my perspective, it can be very easy to believe that all the books and all the courses and all the therapists and coaches and all the concepts and theories and ideas that are floating around, is to fix broken people. One of the things that I love about coaching is that it is not about fixing, it's about creating, it's about expansion.
Whenever I am trying to fix something, it feels scarcity to me. It feels limiting. Of course I'll add this caveat, there are times in your business where you literally need to fix something. Like a link that doesn't work, you need to fix it. That's not what I'm really talking about here. I mean, like the belief that you have a fundamental flaw that needs fixing. That you, as a human, are flawed and therefore need to fix it before you can succeed.
That is not useful, and it's not abundant. So if we want to come from abundance, the game is expansion, not fixing. The game is about your evolution, not winning the game. The point of evolution is not to win. It's to continually evolve and adapt and grow. Expansion is different than fixing, and so when we think about business, the point of business, and I love this concept in Simon Sinek's book, The Infinite Game, he teaches this so masterfully, but the idea is infinite games are not meant to be won.
They're meant to keep playing. So you don't win business, you keep doing business. You don't win at marriage, you keep being married. You don't win in the game of entrepreneurship, you keep being an entrepreneur. That's expansion. I think we have to be mindful that we don't slip into fixing things in our business, that we keep the game expansion. This is about your growth and evolution over your lifetime. It is not about fixing some problem that you were born with. That this fundamental flaw that actually doesn't exist except for people who want to tell you that it does. That's not useful. So when it's like, well, I'm not an entrepreneur, so I have to fix that.
Or like I don't have the right mindset, I need to fix that. I'm like, that's one small perspective. I like to take the bigger perspective, which is like, this is about your personal and business expansion. It just feels different. It feels more open. It's less about solving something for yourself, and more about seeing what's possible.
It's less about solving problems, and it's more about creating. I really love the word expansion, I think feels very abundant to me, and so I think it's a useful distinction is, are you trying to fix something or are you expanding? What's hard about fixing is like something very specific, and I think we're taught this in school, which is why many of us have to unlearn things that we learned in school. Like I'm watching my second grader do math, there's a math equation and there's a right answer. That's convergent thinking. But in life, it's more divergent thinking. So there's lots of possibilities, and I teach this to my clients all the time. There's not a right way to grow a business, there's lots of right ways to grow a business.
That's the idea of fixing versus expansion. Fixing is like, how do I operate my business the right way? Very many people think that they're looking for the right way. And I'm like, oh there's lots of right ways because it's not really about the right way, it's about finding a way that works for you, which is an expansion mindset, an abundant mindset.
You'll know you're in fixing, if you're looking for the right way, or if you're trying to avoid a mistake. That's fixing versus expansion. I think expansion speaks to testing and failing. I think it speaks to more data. I think it speaks to like making mistakes and then improving and keeping the game going. I don't think expansion means you never make mistakes. I've made so many mistakes in my business, but I just keep going. I learned from the data, I make improvements, I iterate, I innovate, and I keep going because I'm in this for the long haul, and this kind of speaks to the concept that I teach, which is I'm here until it works.
What's funny is, when I get something that works, I just have a new mountain peak that I want to climb. The game is infinite. That's expansion. It is not about winning or fixing. It's about continuous growth. For some people who like the predictable, who like the finite games, that can feel pretty daunting because there's no end.
But I have a feeling if you like this podcast, if you listen to podcasts about growth and entrepreneurship and possibility, you like the infinite game. Expansion is the infinite game. You never really get there, you just keep growing. When I found entrepreneurship, that's why it felt like home to me because I didn't have those words as a young girl, like for expansion, or growth and evolution, over a lifetime, or infinite possibilities.
I wanted those things. I just didn't know that they were actually available because of the career path. I was looking at a finite career path: become a therapist, get my own office, take clients, retire. Very finite games versus entrepreneurship has infinite games. Creating a platform, sharing theories and concepts, teaching clients, growing myself as an entrepreneur and a CEO and a coach.
I'm growing myself as a content creator. Those are infinite games. I don't really win. I just get to keep playing and that's abundance to me. So I hope these reframes were helpful. Thank you for listening. If it was helpful for you, please share with a friend who you think would benefit from this. That is my one big ask.
Thank you for being part of my community and I'll talk to you soon.