Hey you guys. Welcome back to the podcast. I'm excited to share a coaching call I recorded with a client from The Miracle Mind. And you know I've been doing this series where I invite people to a private call with me. We record it and I get to share it on the podcast. So I'm excited to share my conversation with Anna.
Like I said, she's in the Miracle Mind and we talk, in this conversation, about a lot of things, but one of the most powerful things I think you'll hear us talk about is personal power versus circumstantial power in business, we talk about fueling your action with belief instead of hustling to overcome your doubt.
We talk about detachment, we talk about releasing judgment, and I think it's really relevant, especially if you feel like you're doing everything right, if you're taking a lot of action and things still aren't working the way you want them to, I think this will be a really helpful episode for you to navigate: What do I do from there?
And I love Anna, and I think you're gonna love her too. And just her mind and how coachable she is. I think you're gonna really enjoy our conversation. So without further ado, let's jump into my conversation with Anna.
Amber: All right, Anna. Welcome to the podcast.
Anna: Thank you. I'm so happy to be here.
Amber: Yeah. I am so happy that you said yes. So we know each other, and we work together and I'm really excited to kind of create on this call. As you know, I like to start with like, what would make this a powerful conversation? What would be useful for you today?
Anna: Yeah. I would love to just get some insight around the way I am creating in my business right now and kind of showing up in my life. There feels like a little dissonance between the conscious work I've done on like embodying joy and presence, with my husband, with my kids, with my body, with my mind, my spirits. Like I've really been focusing on all of those things.
And I love it. And you know me, like I am this high achiever that always wants to be creating more and I definitely want to be creating more results in my business and things aren't always aligning like in the way I want them to or at the speed I want them to. And so I'm finding myself… like, I wanna say I'm giving myself the grace that I give my clients, but I know I'm not because… I don't know, there's a feeling in my body that's not totally settled and calm.
Amber: When does that feeling come up? Could you pinpoint times during the day?
Anna: Like the growth that I really want is in regards to my business. Like it's not around coaching my clients. Like I love that. And it feels so incredible. The conversations we have, the support I give my clients in Voxer, all of that, but maybe I'm putting pressure on myself. It kind of comes around like when I write an email or when I think about an offer or when I'm making a post.
Amber: Okay.
Anna: And I want it to be powerful and life changing for someone, and also I want it to invite someone in to have their life changed by coaching.
Amber: Yeah. And for you to have your business work the way you want it to. It's a lot of pressure on a single email.
Anna: It is. It really is. And it's funny because even if I get into the energy of getting into abundance before I create content. And I really get into service, 'cause I consciously think that it's important that I'm like, how can I help someone? That's the way I wanna go about this. And I believe, when I get into that energy and I believe that it really will. This is powerful. This is gonna sell out every single spot is gonna be filled. This is incredible. I love this offer. I would pay for this offer. And then if it doesn't pan out the way I thought, then it's like sneakily showing me that I am still wanting tangible results right now every time I create something. It's funny because I coach on this all the time, but I still myself, it's like I have a different standard. I've gotta be perfect.
Amber: The perfectionism is something that we can talk about, but I don't think it's bad, per se, that you want results. That's normal. Like you're like, I want the physical results of my business. I've done all this work. So then it's like, what's going on? Where's the dissonance between what you want and what you're creating and why isn't what you want being manifested in the physical form.
Anna: I know that's almost like what I want the answer to. That's what I've been asking myself. Like, you're doing all this work like life outside of business and consciousness and presence and in, my attention to, even though it's not all the time. I'm a mom, I mess up, you know, life happens and I'm not perfect, but I'm so much more attuned to it and I can shift into like having forgiveness for my human self as a mom or as a wife or all these things and feel incredible and like notice all of these shifts in my life, and I definitely have. So I'm much more allowed in my life. But it's like, my brain is like, I'm doing all of that, but something. And I put the ownership on me. Like that's something I love about coaching and I used to not. I'm not blaming anybody but myself for like the results that I'm creating in my business and that I want. And even though I've created some incredible results, I want more, like I really want to step into me, feeling more comfortable being vulnerable, and like, maybe I'm not sharing the message that I really wanna share. Where am I filtering myself and I just am not answering these questions maybe, like am I filtering myself? Am I not playing as big as I think I am? Like how am I trying to protect myself? Because I must be, because I know how powerful coaching is. I know the incredible results my clients get. And I'm like, why does this not feel like it's translating on a larger scale and like I want it to right now.
Amber: I might phrase your question a different way, like, why isn't it happening faster? I'm curious like, I mean, I'm sure you've heard a client ask you a version of that question. Why isn't my success happening faster?
Anna: Yeah, totally.
Amber: And I know that you study similar things to me. So like what would your answer be to that? Why isn't it happening faster?
Anna: I know. Ooh. I mean, my answer to them, which is obviously like my answer to myself is like, it is what it is. My job is to love what it is. And I think the challenge for me, which I know is for my clients too, whether they're a coach and they wanna make more money or they're really on a health journey and they want to lose weight and feel succeed in credible in their bodies, whatever it is, or have difference in their marriage with their partner. It's not easy to love what is, and at the same time, keep pushing for that more, without attachment, like, without needing, without needing a result. Maybe I'm actually needing it.
Amber: Yeah. So this is the hardest paradox to live by, in my opinion. The first time that I felt it was before I really could apply it to business. I was living in Las Vegas. I've told this story before where I kind of hated it. I was reading the book, Loving What Is by Byron Katie. And it was basically like, I need to accept Vegas. And literally the day that I did, I got a call from my husband who's like, hey, my job wants to move us to Reno. And I was like, that's where we wanna live. And I remember being like, there is something to this, but I genuinely had to make peace with where I was.
Fast forward years later when I was doing my business, same thing. I had to come to the place and this is what I teach you, like need nothing, right? We've talked about that before. I've talked about it on the podcast, like not that you won't do work to create the business that you want, but you have to be in a place with yourself that if your business never works, you are okay because your business doesn't make your life better.
Your consciousness, your thoughts, your beliefs make your life peaceful, loving, abundant, beautiful. And you don't need your business to do that. And so it's funny because you think I'm saying like, don't worry if your business never works. And that's not what I'm saying, it is a paradox where internally you're like, I never need my business to work, I will be okay without it working. But I don't know if you're there yet.
Anna: Maybe I'm not there like I want to be, because I do have so many examples where I can look back and look at really challenging times in my business. And yeah, I mean, it's not like I've been doing this 20 years. I had a whole career before I became a coach, so it's, I launched my business in June of 21. So it's been a little over two years and I've had rapid growth, and then I've had periods where it's been like crickets.
Like I really do celebrate myself for the challenging times that I've already gotten through. And I see like even a launch that I just recently had for a mastermind, and I watched how I grew and how I allowed myself to be supported. And how I found a beauty and it's like I am doing this and now it's like I'm invited to be doing this on another level again.
I know there's always another level. There's always another growth edge. Maybe this is what I just need to practice and like give myself compassion and allow today is that like, I am on another growth edge yet again. And part of my human is like, I'm done with the freaking growth edges already. Like isn't it time that we just like rapidly reach this place where there aren't anymore?
Amber: But is that what you actually want?
Anna: No. No. It's like, you know what I want? It's funny, like what I really want is to not feel the discomfort of the growth edge. But I'm an entrepreneur and the thing is I get to allow that it's gonna be there, but like part of me doesn't wanna feel it, cause it's hard.
Amber: But this is what I really want you to shift, is uncomfortable emotions, negative emotions are there for us. A lot of people have a different philosophy. My philosophy is that negative emotions come when you're believing something not true about you.
Anna: Ugh. Yeah.
Amber: So when you have a launch that doesn't go the way you want it to, the reason you feel bad is because you're believing something like, it's never gonna work. And it's not that you feel bad because it's never gonna work. It's because believing it's never gonna work is not true.
So your emotional guidance system is alerting you, Anna, that what you're believing is not true. So what are you believing that it's not true?
Anna: Probably that. Like that I won't have the scale of the type of business I want.
Amber: You can't have the business that you want. How does that feel?
Anna: I know. It feels horrible.
Amber: It feels awful because it's not true. And this is your chance to choose and to declare this is what I want and I believe I can have it.
Anna: Yeah. It totally is. And I've given myself that time and time again. And then I find myself, I keep showing up. Like I keep doing. I keep creating. I keep making offers and talking with people and inviting wonderful people into my world. And then hearing no’s, you know, it's all part of it.
I don't even know if it's so much like the speed, like, oh, I want it now, but maybe it's this belief that who am I to have like a wildly successful coaching business, and make shit tons of money? It's almost like I can't do that. Like I can do what I've done. It's great. It's awesome and I love it.
But yet that next level almost seems out of reach. Almost like, I don't know the how. And I know that's not true. Like I believe that everybody's blueprint. Like my blueprint, everyone's blueprint is deep inside. And so it's just not revealed to me, 'cause maybe it's scary to claim this about myself, that I can just give myself permission to step into the next level of myself and then I ask, who is that?
Amber: And what just came to me while you're talking is what you teach is ease and abundance and consciousness. But what you're living is hard work, pushing through, overcoming adversity. What if you really believed it was easy for you? I don't think you believe that.
Anna: I don't either.
Amber: But you're trying to teach your clients that they can live that.
Anna: Yeah. I always have worked really hard my whole life.
Amber: Comes easy to you.
Anna: Super easy. Even though it's funny, it's like I'm practicing the flow, and I'm practicing all of these things, but yet…
Amber: Not in business.
Anna: Yeah, but not in business. Every other area of my life, which by the way, it doesn't feel hard for me to work out every day. It doesn't feel hard for me to practice meditation. It doesn't feel hard to like dance in the kitchen and read my kids' books at night and snuggle with my husband, because I have embodied that. You are so right.
Amber: If you guys don't follow Anna, you should, because your energy is very like abundant and high vibe, and like contagious. But what's interesting it's like, but business feels different to you and so it is. It's a self-fulfilling prophecy that you have to work hard, that you have to struggle. Now I will say there's some things that happen for us. You know, I teach the sequence of unfolding events. So like this one launch is not the end of your career like at all.
And in fact, I know what you're trying to do. And so I coach a few coaches that decide to be business coaches and I'm always like, be mindful. If you say to the universe, I am going to coach on money. You know what the first thing is gonna show up in your own life? Hard times with money. You wanna coach on business? You know what the first thing that's gonna show up in your business? Because you have to know how to hold your own power for your clients when they go through hardship. And so to me, it's not an indication that it's not right. It's like this is your refiners' fire to become the person that you say you want to be.
I've watched lots of clients go through this. You're going through this right now. It's like, oh, you wanna be this kind of coach? You better be able to walk your talk through your own hard times and maintain your message, which is ease, abundance, overflow in business.
Anna: I know. And Amber, it's so funny, it's like I wanna ask you the how so badly right now and like that's not even the question. I know that. Like, there has to be an allowing. It truly, like I don't believe everything always goes to mindset work or thought work, but this one to me, maybe you can illuminate if I'm not catching this right. But to me like that's just a thought that I get to, really that's my work, is to believe that it does get to be easy and simple in business that I actually just can decide to embody ease and flow in my business just like I do in every other area of my life.
It's interesting, you know, we've talked about this before, like with my niche and I love recently you were like “Anna niche your offer, not yourself” which I love. This is part of like, I'm still struggling a little bit with like, I did this big launch and it was solely for coaches and entrepreneurs. And when I didn't get the results that I thought I could or should, whatever you wanna say get, I've noticed myself backing down and I don't necessarily know if I want to from speaking directly to coaches.
And also I'm like, well, I don't wanna niche myself. I can help anybody, but maybe I'm not answering that question. But who do you really want to help? And it's not wrong to niche, like if you want to, but I don't know if you've even seen my content in the last week. I got really general again. And I'm not saying that's wrong or right, but I just noticed that. It was like, Ooh, let's go into protective mode, because that felt a little rough.
Amber: Yeah. To me, it's not what you do that's important. I'm way more curious, like what was behind that? Like what were you believing about yourself and your business that caused you to do that? Because if it just felt more fun that it felt like ease, that it felt so like abundant and free to talk about that, I'm like, there's nothing wrong with that. But if you did it because of fear, I'd be really interested in that.
Anna: Well, maybe this will tell me something like, say I would have filled every single spot. Say the results would've been different. What would I be talking about right now? I don't know if it'd be the same thing that I am.
Amber: So then what that tells me, we've talked about circumstantial power and personal power.
Is that you have circumstantial power about your business. That you talk about what you wanna talk about when it feels good, when you have the evidence. But when you don't, you were treat into talking about something that you don't actually wanna talk about.
Anna: Yeah. Or it just feels almost safer.
Amber: That's not bad.
Anna: It's not that I don't wanna talk about it. Yeah. 'cause I do like, I love all the things like health and relationships and the cool thing is like, of course all of that really applies to anybody who is a growth seeker, entrepreneur, coach. But it's like all of a sudden I found myself almost retreating from what I've said I've wanted to do for a while. And it does seem very circumstantial now that I'm like looking at it and talking about it with you.
Amber: Yeah. I don't think it's always bad. I know during phases of my life, I wasn't ready to talk about the next thing. How did I know that? Because the words wouldn't come to me. Just because timing isn't right, doesn't mean it's not ultimately right, either. But I do think you're in the process of becoming. And that's what I want you to calibrate to, not the lack, not the loss, not the failure. It's like this is the sequence of unfolding events where I become the coach that I want to become. That feels so different.
Anna: Yeah, it really does. It honestly feels light. Like even as I just write that down because I love that, calibrate to the becoming. Number one, that's like permission to feel a little bit of that unease, even though I'm all about ease and abundance. When we are becoming, it's not going to 100% feel like, I don't know, a walkthrough, a field of flowers because there is growth there. It's almost like I have this unrealistic expectation for myself too.
Or not unrealistic, just very human, very human expectation. Like I don't wanna feel that discomfort of becoming. And I already went through this edge, so, ooh, if I back off, it'll feel better. And also I hear myself and I don't believe that it has to feel horrible, but growth is discomfort, like it is not comfortable. And maybe it's like I'm searching for the balance of being in abundance and an ease and an overflow in my life. And actually creating that in my business while I continue to grow because, even with the ease and the overflow and the abundance, there will be discomfort.
Amber: That will be true because you believe it's true. Because like I don't experience growth as like this awful thing. I don't. What feels bad is believing something that's not true. So in your growth, if you feel like I'm doing something wrong. I'm not good enough yet. It feels bad because that's not the ultimate truth of who you are.
Anna: Yeah, that's so true.
Amber: Not that it's always easy or like super amazing, but like growth doesn't have to be this like, almost like suffering. You don't have to suffer through it. I don't believe that.
Anna: Yeah. I like that. I mean that's true. It is true. So what I believe about expanding.
Amber: What do you want to believe about your expansion?
Anna: Yeah. I just get to decide what I want to believe that because like I'm just like, oh, it's gonna have to feel hard.
Amber: I know that's what I'm trying to call out. You really believe that. This is part of, this is it. I'm like, not necessarily.
Anna: Right. And I appreciate that because I'm truly just choosing to believe that.
Amber: The way that I understand business is like the easiest way to do it is to go through the path of least resistance, but that does not mean there's no resistance, it just means that there doesn't have to be as much as you think there is. You could just start feeling great about your business right now. Despite whatever results you've gotten recently. Everything could change today. And in fact, it's important that you start seeing those possibilities if you want to create them. Which means new words, new way of being today. Like the words that we just said was like the calibrating to who you're becoming now, and telling the story.
Anna: You are so right. I mean, I love doing future self work, highest self work. And I'm thinking, okay, I just get to do this like I do with my own clients. Like it's my turn again, to say if I had this circumstantial result, how would I feel? And I actually see that I am waiting right now. I'm waiting to feel a certain way on results. I mean, it's funny, I talk about this all the time. I think I sent an email today, it's like, hello Anna.
Amber: We have to take our medicine first. It's always for us first, our emails, our posts are always for us first. That doesn't stop. This was my big aha. I was listening to Jim Thornton, have you heard of Jim Thornton?
Anna: Yes.
Amber: Okay. He was really the person that taught me that. And I had this realization, this was when I was working on getting fully booked. I was like, if I was fully booked, I would not be thinking about me. I would be so immersed in solving problems for my clients and inventing the next thing that would help them. I wouldn't really have time to like wonder if my business was working or not. I would be in it helping my clients.
Anna: Yeah, absolutely. That is an embodied place because it becomes not about you at all. And it's not.
Amber: Yes, and then we become the guide. That's what the role of a coach is. It's not even about us at all. It's not about our business working or not, it's about are my clients' businesses working? Are they having the marriage that they want or the health that they want? Because I see you as like a personal power coach and you could do that in lots of different ways.
And so then it's like, what could I write today that would help them claim their personal power more? It's like so involved in being the conduit or the vessel or the catalyst for someone else. That's how you know, you've really embodied the, I'm being the fully booked coach. It's not that you don't think about your business or like tend to it, but that's not the primary focus.
Anna: Yeah. I love that. It's like, how many times am I gonna need that reminder?
Amber: Oh, I remind myself all the time. So this is why I like reading books and investing in my own coaching and mentorship because it helps me get back to that. It's like, oh yeah, this isn't about me. Because this is be, do, have, right?
Who are the people that think about themselves and their failing businesses the most? People with failing businesses. Well, I don't wanna be like that. I wanna be like someone who's thriving and successful. What do they think about? How do they be in the world? They're obsessed with helping their clients and inventing new programs and pumping out content in service to others.
So I wanna be like that.
Anna: Right. I love that.
Amber: You just said you liked future self work. Let's say, let's fast forward to like your 70 year old self. What does she say about this failed launch?
Anna: I don't wanna say that it was nothing, but almost like, of course.
Amber: It's a story to tell?
Anna: Yeah. It's a story. It's just look at that and look at how I shifted and look at how that almost allowed you to just evolve. I do believe that, like I couldn't have accessed some of the insights that I got that you helped me with, that like our entire mastermind. Like without having failed, in a certain way, I wouldn't have had the insights that I have now. And even this discussion with you wouldn't have been accessible. So, seventy year old self just smiles and it's like, keep going, baby.
Amber: And she would be like, yeah, I was so upset. But then I realized, you know, whatever your aha was, and then I just kept going. And then it's like a part of the unfolding. And that's why I teach the sequence of unfolding events because it's not that it doesn't matter. It's just that it's a bead on a string. It's one bead. There's lots of other beads. And it's so important how you contextualize this part of your business into the grand scheme.
It is an important piece. It actually means nothing about what you're capable of, or what you'll create today. You could sign five clients today, you know what I mean? Like we don't know. Your resonant way of being today. That's why it's like we wanna always do the work of consciousness or whatever to creation to trend up, instead of trending down.
Anna: Yeah, and it's just interesting that unless we are observant and conscious about it, our default, my default, doesn't matter who you are. The default is to trend down because that's what our ego will do. That's what, I just get to give that to myself. Like of course, my brain is doing this just like everybody else's brain.
No matter how much coaching I've gotten, no matter how much coaching I've invested in, this is why like I love having a coach. And I love investing in myself because no matter what, like the pool is always very human, even though our essence is this limitless spirit that gets covered up so easily if we aren't intentional.
Amber: And what I love about this game, I was actually talking about this with my friend, it's like we want to forget how powerful we are so that we can remember how powerful we are. And that's life. Because if we never forgot how powerful we are, we can never have the experience of remembering. So this is your chance to remember. And it feels awesome to remember.
Anna: It really does.
Amber: And as you really apply what we talked about with like, how does this help your client? It's like you write a post for you, but it's for them. How does someone who's experienced failure recently come back? What advice would you tell yourself and now poach that as a post for someone else? That's where you start to write in a way that deeply resonates.
Anna: Yeah I can do that.
Amber: You are doing it.
Anna: Yeah. That feels good. That feels better. I need to remember that.
Amber: And I think too, like when things are fresh, we have a different perspective than like, because I think about a failed launch I had a couple years ago where I got one person and how I felt in the moment. I was like, mortified. But now I tell this story and it's funny and it's actually useful for my clients. What's interesting is how I feel now, which is funny. It's funny. It's useful. That feeling was available to me right after the launch failed. I could have felt like, this is funny, this is useful.
It's harder to access that, but it was available. That's why the future self, for you, it's like it matters, but it doesn't, you're gonna be fine, right. Like that's where we want to go now. Gets you feeling better, gets you trending up, puts you back in service, and back in creating what you actually want.
Anna: Back into service. Like that's the ticket really. It truly is. Back into service. That at the end of the day, there's nothing wrong at all with my life. You know, it's actually really beautiful and it's like I judge it this one little area, because it's not where I want it and yet how many, like that's why I'm doing this work and that's why I wanna help people because it's so common to stay there.
Amber: This is my one insight for you. You keep telling the story that your business is not where you want it. That is where your consciousness is about your business. What would be different if you started telling the story of it being exactly what you wanted, that you're so grateful that you get to help women on the internet. Your job is to inspire other people to step into their own personal power. You get to connect with people for free on Instagram, in your emails. You're tuned into the fact that there are people who follow you very closely that pay you money to talk to you.
Anna: Yeah. It's freaking incredible.
Amber: That you got to quit your PT job. That you get to be there for your kids pick up. That you get to celebrate with your husband. You're both entrepreneurs. That you live in abundant life. That you get to sip coffee and meditate in them every morning. You get to go on walks in the middle of the afternoon. That you get Voxer to your clients like, start telling that story.
Anna: Thank you, Amber! Why did I forget that? Yeah, it is the biggest gift. Almost like I have to pinch myself sometimes because it is incredible and I'm that supported and I feel that loved. And my husband and, like it's amazing.
Amber: And more will come. The better it gets, the better it gets. Expansion is not about looking at what you have now and saying it's not enough, I need more. It's like I love what I have, including my business. I love the business I have now, and I'm so excited for a fully booked launch. I'm so excited for that next client that pays me my new rate. I'm so excited for my next client who doesn't have any objections, who's just a yes, ready to work with me.
Anna: Oh my gosh, yes.
Amber: But like, do you see that's such a different story. That's the story that I tell myself every day.
Anna: Yes, I love it, Amber.
Amber: And the key is I told it before that was actually my reality to where you are now.
Anna: A hundred percent. And when I look at it just like that, like all of the things that this is actually allowed for me just as the business, right? The business side actually, how beautiful it is. I don't know how it's gonna sound like there's a thousand million trillion other people who would want to be able to say that. And yet here I am almost like having a little pity party about it. And to me now, it just almost looks silly because that's ridiculous.
Amber: But it's not based on what you were believing at the time, which is why…
Anna: You're so right. It felt so real.
Amber: It did. And it does, and that's why coaching is so powerful. 'Cause for your clients, it will feel so real. They're gonna be sharing their story as if it is concrete. Like this is just how it is. and then it stays that way. And so telling the story what you want, remembering what's true, what you want to be true, and activating that, what you just did, what you just felt, what you just became aware of is the work.
Anna: Yes, that is beautiful. I love it.
Amber: It reminds me of our call a while ago where I was like, why aren't you telling the story about how you quit your PT job to go full-time as a coach? You're like, yeah, but that was like two years ago. I was like, but that is still relevant for people and you are always gonna be that person. No matter if your business goes up and down. No matter if you have a failed launch or a launch that didn't go as you wanted it to. You're still the person who made enough money to leave their PT job.
Anna: Yeah. I know that's beautiful. I do, I forget the little things that when I was there, I celebrated like everything out of that. And then all of a sudden, oh, well everybody does that. No, they don't.
Amber: Yes. No, they don't.
Anna: My brain keep saying everybody can do this. No. It's not true. Everybody can, but they don't.
Amber: They can. They don't because they forget how powerful they are. And I see consciousness like a flashlight, like there's so many choices to shine your light on. You could shine your light on my failed launch and how it's not working, how my business isn't where I want it to be yet. Or you can shine a light on all the things that we just described. That you're living your dream life. That you have your dream career right now. That your clients and your followers, the people who are impacted by you for free, and the people who are impacted by you in your paid containers. Both. That's our role as a coach. We do both. You are living it right now.
Anna: That's so true, and I forgot it for a second.
Amber: But now you're remembered.
Anna: Yeah. And it feels a lot better. And let's just highlight, we did this by talking to each other. Like I talked with my coach today and it changed the way I felt. And that changes everything.
Amber: And it changes what you'll create today.
Anna: Changes what I create. This is why, like it gives me goosebumps. That this is available for everyone too. It's the most beautiful thing.
Amber: Yeah. And this is why you do what you do.
Anna: I love it.
Amber: Awesome.
Anna: Thank you so much.
Amber: I think we're complete.
Anna: Yeah, I do too.
Amber: Yeah. Awesome. Thanks Anna.
Anna: Thank you.
